Agnosis Skeptikos

The introspective wanderings of a one-time Christian turned agnostic

Archive for June, 2007

Bad Astronomy

Posted by agnosis on June 28, 2007

I’ve been following a blog called Bad Astronomy for several weeks now. I stumbled across it in my quest for new and interesting things to read. BA has actually served, in part, to aid my decision to become agnostic. I have really come to appreciate his detailed approach at exposing the flaws in many of the “scientific” claims from the religious community (with creationism being one of his favorite soapboxes to get on). If you enjoy science and like learning new things, check out BA and get a taste of some of what’s going on currently in his field. It’s pretty cool stuff.

Edit: This video entry actually demonstrates a large part of why I’ve left the Christian faith. If Christians can’t be honest with their “science” and must, then, resort to lies to convince anyone of the veracity of their biblical claims, then that must cast a large shadow over the supposed “truth” of their claims. Of course, I would have preferred that Killian had avoided name-calling in the comments to his video, but of course, it’s not like he started it. It’s just too bad that these kinds of debates inevitably degenerate into that sort of behavior – but that’s a rant for another day. For now, I’m comfortable just pointing out the weaknesses of “Christian science” and the role they’ve played in my leaving that way of thinking behind.

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Powerless

Posted by agnosis on June 28, 2007

One of the big questions blaring in my head right now is this: If Christianity is such a powerful faith, where then is all the power? Christianity claims the power to change lives, to turn even the ugliest character and turn it into a shining example of God’s redemptive powers. It claims to have the power to bring new “sheep into the fold.”

But if this is the case, I ask you, then why don’t Christians look or act any different from anyone else? If Christianity effects such powerful changes in the lives of its adherents, why is it that most churches are divided on themselves and split over trivial issues? Why are Christians some of the worst when it comes to backstabbing, name-calling, hate-mongery, and the like? If Christianity is so damn powerful, then why aren’t Christians any different from anyone else? Shouldn’t Christians then be the ones leading the way to peace and tranquility and mercy and forgiveness, instead of being the first ones in line to spew their harsh words of anger and bitterness and strife?

I’ve no use for such people. I’ve no use for powerless religions, and I forsake Christianity for the powerless and ineffectual religion that it is. I see nothing there to draw me to it, its people, or its God. What those Christians do in actuality, no matter what words they speak and say they believe in, I can do without their supposed faith. Why in hell would I want to take on the burden of such a religious system?

I wouldn’t. And I don’t.

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Pronouncements of Doom

Posted by agnosis on June 27, 2007

Apparently, the Christian mission to share the Gospel gives them the right to toss tact to the wind. I can’t count the number of times I’ve heard a Christian tell someone point-blank that they’re going to hell. Talk about a great way to shut someone down and turn them off to your message immediately. Frankly, it’s disgusting how rude and obnoxious most Christians are as they go about trying to ‘convert’ others to their way of thinking. I don’t understand why they think that such an approach might work, yet the persistence of this technique indicates that Christians think such in-your-face tactics should not only work but that the truth of their message as conveyed by this approach should be blatantly self-evident to whoever their victim is that day. I guess it shouldn’t be surprising, then, that they are completely blind to the fact that the interpersonal doors of communication get slammed right in their face and anything else that’s said henceforth from such a dire pronouncement is ignored and disregarded as the rantings of a lunatic. Who wants to be a Christian when faced with that kind of antagonism and hostility? I sure don’t.

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False Face

Posted by agnosis on June 20, 2007

I find myself in a difficult and uncomfortable position. I keep my newfound agnostic beliefs a secret from everyone but myself. My wife is a Christian, as is nearly my entire family and the vast majority of my friends. This isn’t a bad thing, mind you – it is simply a product of the way I grew up. I love my wife, my family, my friends, and despite having left my own Christian faith behind, I cannot fault them for their continued devotion to their faith. I refuse to be one of those harbors spite and malice to anyone who holds to religious beliefs. I’ve been the focus of such individuals, and I fail to see how such animosities serve any good end.

But neither can I reveal myself as agnostic. None who know me would understand, least of all my wife, who would likely feel hurt and betrayed by my lack of belief. I do not mind “living a lie,” as the phrase goes, for her sake. But the discomfort arrives when it comes to thing having to do with this faith I no longer embrace. I have no interest in going to church, in praying or reading my Bible, or talking about religious issues. All such things seem like such a waste of time to me now – but for the sake of appearances I must continue to do them so as not to cast any question on myself.

I’d like to be able to talk to a few trusted friends about this, but I know that to do so would only net me a series of lectures, many disappointed looks, shock and surprise, sympathy and pity, perhaps, and more reactions that I have no desire to face and deal with. Putting on a facade is much easier and less hassle all around, believe me. So far, there isn’t as much internal tension as I expected. I’m ok living life like this. I expect one of these days the truth will come out, probably when I least expect and probably exactly when I don’t want it to, but until then, I’ll continue to pretend Christianity for the sake of my family and friends (and for my own sanity), but practice living life in a way that I need no Christian faith to accomplish. From what I’ve seen, you don’t need to be a Christian to live a good life. It doesn’t even really seem to help all that much.

But that’s an entry for another time.

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Agnostic. I think.

Posted by agnosis on June 20, 2007

I recently determined that I’m agnostic – at least that’s the best self-definition for my current belief system I can come up with. I certainly wouldn’t say that I’m an atheist. You still can’t convince me that the universe came together through some grand, cosmic accident. I just tend to think now that whatever intelligent being was the cause of all this has since lost interest and moved on – or died – and left the universe to while away on its own. I also can’t really say I subscribe to the Christian faith I was raised under for so many years, the one that I once immersed myself in and tried to find some sort of life meaning from. Neither it nor any other belief system that worships a deity of any kind really holds up in my view anymore.

As I said I was raised Christian, embracing that faith myself at a young age and living it out for years. But as I’ve grown up and entered adulthood, there are a lot of things about Christianity that no longer add up, things that run counter to logic and common sense and observable fact. This blog will, I hope, be a catalogue of some of my thoughts and explorations about why I feel like Christianity may, in fact, be less than the powerful faith that it claims to be. I hope that those of you reading here will follow along and interact with me as I elaborate on some of these thoughts.

Of course, I don’t necessarily plan to stick exclusively to topics of agnosticism and Christianity and what-not. Part of my interest in blogging anonymously here is to be able to write about topics that aren’t necessarily acceptable in the social circles in which I live. Some of those may find exposure here, as well. We’ll just have to see how things go.

So, here’s to a new beginning and future growth…

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